Hey everyone, sorry it's been so long since my last entry. We've had a lot going on. My daughter turned 4 last week, so we had a busy time preparing for that.
And then there is the subject of this blog. I enrolled my youngest son at a local preschool and he started last Monday. For a while now I've been saying that I need to get him used to me leaving him ready for starting at the school nursery in September, but I kept putting it off. So a fortnight ago I took the first step. I called the local preschool expecting a waiting list. No such luck, there was a space available from the following Monday! I wasn't sure I (erm, I mean he) was ready, but hey ho, at least I didn't have time to dwell on it.
Monday came and he was so excited to be starting 'big boy school'. I dropped him off, in he went all smiles and waves, while I struggled to hold myself together. I gave him a kiss and walked out, then promptly burst into tears as soon as the teacher shut the door! It was the longest 2 hours of my life! And I had to do this 3 mornings a week.
Tuesday was a bit harder. The little man had worked out that mummy was leaving him for a bit and he clung to me like glue. And it has only got worse since. Yesterday he started crying as soon as we were walking up the drive to the preschool. And this morning he was screaming before we'd even dropped the big 2 off at school! He's fine once I've gone, and is perfectly happy when I collect him. But that initial reaction is horrible to witness.
It's absolutely heartbreaking. And I feel so so guilty that I'm leaving him there then just coming home by myself to have a coffee. I know it's for his own good, and he's got to get used to being apart from me at some point, but it doesn't make it any easier. And I'm finding it increasingly harder to fight back my own tears as he's clinging to my legs screaming at me not to go.
So, here's hoping he gets used to it sooner rather than later. I don't know how much longer I can keep this up! And I'll try and be back with another blog soon.
